This week has once again been proof that your twenties are just the weirdest time. Sure, we might be checking the same age box, but the spectrum of maturity and life choices is all over the place. Some people are living in the past.
Others are opting to “grow up” and settle down. Overall there’s a lot of judgement going on in all directions. My Facebook news feed is a wasteland of ring photos and red cups. Scrolling through: Oh my gawd, she is engaged? Who would marry her? Or the alternative: why is she acting like she’s still in college?
On Sunday afternoon, I found out that the first of my friends is having a child intentionally. Intentionally is really the key word there as I have a few who have happy accidents. Still, the idea that someone my age is choosing to have a child led me to a mental ping pong match where I went back and forth between feeling way behind in life and being thrilled with my current freedoms. Isn’t that the plight of the twenty-something?
After all, I can put my child in his crate and let him chill while I go to happy hour. Or put a cone on his head as punishment for bad behavior. Do that to your human child and see how fast CPS shows up at your house.
In case you needed a preview. This is what I’d choose.
If you’ve got a few minutes, I suggest you read it, as the article goes into why diamonds are coveted in America (I’ll give you a hint, it all went down Mad Men style) and how the prices are controlled. To go all Kanye on you: That ish cray.
So obviously the next logical step is to go on a rant to your boyfriend and tell him that you don’t want a diamond and that he’ll have to think of something else. After all, Kate Middleton has a sapphire. Halle Berry has an emerald. You can be unconventional. You can be modern. You’re a vegetarian! You’re a liberal! You’re living in sin!
So I’ve come up with a list. The diamond alternative list. Here are some things that the beau could present to me with that I would 100% happily accept in lieu of a diamond:
1. Archie’s new little sister. A golden girl named Anchor.
2. A savings account with a jump start on a down payment on a small house.
3. An epic vacation to Greece, Italy, and Croatia.
I just wrote this whole post and haven’t decided if I was kidding or not. The boyfriends best suggestion? A ring pop and his undying love. Deal!