Wanted: Coordination Classes

Do I look like someone with poise?

Folks, something is going on with me lately.

I don’t know whether I’m getting older (oh wait, I am, every second) 
or just have lost control of my body as a whole.
I’m losing coordination skills by the minute.

I didn’t tell you this (cause silly, I was embarrassed),
but at my parents house last week, I fell down the stairs.

I landed smack dab on my tailbone on the edge of the hardwood stair.

Then I just sat in a ball (child’s pose, if you will) on the floor for 10 minutes while laugh-crying and could not stand up. It hurt so bad. I also bruised both elbows pretty severely.
With that behind me, I’ve been trying to gain a little poise.
I’ve also avoided sitting down cause my tush still kills.


So this weekend, I’m walking in a crowded parking lot. I mean HUGE groups of people headed to a sporting event kind of crowded. I wasn’t going to said sporting event so I had Archie McHyperpants with me, losing his shit over every person he saw. What can I say, he loves people. He also is going straight back for intermediate obedience classes after this.

So as we walk down the sidewalk in front of and behind a huge group of people, 
one minute I’m up, the next I’m down.
And not like on my knees down. Like, ripped my bag, scraped up my hands, bruised my knees, down.
I was so down that I basically looked like I was planking.
I planked the pavement with my face.
Remember when planking was a thing?

Well this nice older couple helped with Archie and helped me up.
As I bled all down my hand, I carried my 45 pound dog back to the car. 

You may as well know, I’m squeemish about blood.
Those surgery scenes in Grey’s Anatomy? I look away.
So this huge flap of skin hanging off my hand is not my favorite thing.


Thankfully, my parents live near by and my stepmom was willing to leave a pedicure (seriously, now that’s love) to come bandage me up. And now, since I don’t ever want to look at it again and I don’t have enough first aid supplies, I’m going to leave this yucky bandage on for a while longer. 

So you know those people who are awkward and clumsy and it’s kind of endearing? I’m not one of those. Just know that if we knew each other IRL (blogger speak for in real life), I’d probably trip, run into something, or generally embarrass myself within minutes of meeting you.

Here’s what I wore today:


So that’s how my weekend went. It also included:

Friday night solo. Missing Nav. Hanging with my fam. Belated Birthday dinner. Daylight savings. 14 hour work event. Nav got home. Presents! Unexpected presents! Sleep. Lots of sleep.

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