Back When I Was A Real Blonde

Once upon a time, my hair grew out of my head light golden blonde.
Was I a toe head? Maybe not. But I sure was close.
Ah, those were the glory days.

Even my bangs were better then.

Overtime, it faded. As most blonde hair does.
To what the average American would call “dirty blonde”.
Mine specifically is weird-almost-brown-looks-a-little-grey blonde.
I promise you, you do not see women walking around with this hair color.
That’s because anyone with my actual hair color dyes it.
Around age 13, my Mom let me get at that $3.99 bottle of Sun In.
Let’s just say the amount of time I spent in the bathroom increased exponentially.
Spray Sun In. Blow dry. Spray more. Blow dry. More. Blow dry.
How magical was that stuff?
Screw waiting for the sun to naturally lighten your hair.
You were one blow dry away from the blonde you always wanted!
I was hooked.

One of the 3 photos circa 7th grade. Not a good time for me.

And the way that I was about the Sun In,
that same thing basically happened when I graduated to the big girl blonde.
By age 15, I was pulling my hair through those old lady highlighting caps on the reg.

His hair is almost the color my hair should have been.

To address the question we both know you’re thinking,
Yes, my brother has always been better looking than me.
His awkward stage was much shorter too.
I’ve made peace with it.

Senior year of High School. How was it this long? How? This is also an example of a poorly executed side bang.

By college, my hair was about to fall out of my head.
Until the one time that my own experimentation went so wrong,
I reported to a salon that very same day. 

Like any proper sorority girl, I remembered to hold my red cup out of the photo.

Since then, I’ve left it up to the professionals. 
Except that one time a few months ago that I did it myself.
Always a mistake.
Nadine, learn from this
Now this week I’m headed back to the salon and once again,
the blonde Gods are calling to me.
“Blonder, Nadine…”
“And a little ashier too…”

It’s happening again.
The blonde is an addiction.
I get that this post could probably have been called:
Nadine and her brother, through the years.
But basically only my Mom would have enjoyed that.
I hope your weekend was as uneventful as mine was.
The laziness continued and it was glorious. 

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